The eternal truth is that at one point of time, we all will remain only as memories in some people's mind. Some don't even have such people to remember them, and they vanish from memories too, without leaving any trace that they lived on this earth once.
Morning when my Mother called to inform that today is my Grandfather's (Paternal - Appa's Appa) Commemmoration day. I used to refer him as "Uttukuli Thatha", as he worked as in Railways in a Small Railway Station called Uttukuli, that is the station next to Tiruppur railway station. Its the saem Uttukuli that is famous for its butter(Uttukuli vennai). After retirement he built a home and moved to our native, named "KeelMuduthurai" after which he became "Muduthurai Thatha". Now I remember him as Muduthurai Thatha.
Right from my childhood, his interaction with me was minimal and limited. At this age, I can understand that he must have had many restrictions and limitations, in talking and interacting with me, probably from people who were close to him, at that time. But still on top of that, I had a good relationship with him, and have a few memorable moments when he was almost near the end of his life. Today morning I was telling my friend about all of those, and thought why not I write those in my blog, and now I am typing this.
When I was very small, probably around 8 years old, I stayed in my native with my Paternal grandparents for a week or so. That was unique, in the sense that I was alone with them. Normally my sisters also used to stay, whenever our parents leave us with our grandparents. My parents leaving us with Grandparents, is a rare occasion. Hence that was the only instance, when I stayed alone with my Paternal Grandparents in Muduthurai.
Muduthurai is very small old-styled village, with only a few houses. My grandfather, being a retired Railway Employee commanded some respect there, which I could realize when I stayed there. There used to many visitors to home, from dawn till dusk. Muduthurai Thatha is notorious for his impeccable dressing. The formal shirts in light colors like light rose, light grey, sandal wood, were the ones he used to wear, along with a pure white dhoti. His shirts will be cleanly washed, ironed and toned. He used a have handkerchief between his neck and his shirt collar, to prevent sweat from spoiling the shirt collar.
Early in the morning he used to get ready, and along with him I also used to get ready. Then we both used to walk to Puliyampatti, a small town which was at a distance of about 4 kms. Buses are rare, with just one bus running three times a day, once in the morning, once in the afternoon and once in the evening. Hence people don't depend on the bus, but rather walk or cycle to Puliampatti. There are two routes to reach that place, one is through the bus route and the other through the farms, and my grandfather preferred the one through the farms. The route at times used to be scary, with snakes spotted at times. But I used to walk with him and at times run ahead of him. Our destination invariably was a hotel in Puliyampatti, where he used to eat his breakfast. Idli, dosai, poori... I still remember the way he used to eat, enjoying every bit of it. Later on I understood that, given his health condition he was not supposed to eat those hotel food, and those food also could have contributed to his health issues. But no one can stop, or even request him. He is what he thinks he is, and he acts how he wants to be. No-one or nothing can interrupt. Such uncontrollable nature of him, in my understanding, accelerated his end.
During the same stay, he took me to the cinema theater once. It was the Sridevi theatre in Puliyampatti, evening show for the movie "Paasa Paravaigal". We started getting ready in the afternoon, walked and reached Puliyampatti. We were waiting outside the theater. Many identified him and he started talking and discussed with him. Unexpected thing happened when the ticket counter was opened. People started running towards the counter, entering into it, pushing each other, literally running on top of each other. It was not much crowded, and given the size of theater, everyone would have got the ticket and they could have entered comfortably. Hence the need to rush like that didn't araise at all, but still people were doing that. As I was watching the chaos, I noticed that my grandfather who was standing next to me vanished. Found that he was making a quick progress towards the ticket counter, pushing everyone in front of him, reached the counter and got the tickets - a skill I never have, even today. From there he shouted "Raja Raja...", asking me to come inside. I waited for the crowd to subside, then went inside, and with no choice left, he was patiently waiting for me. We both then went inside the movie hall. We had dinner outside in the same hotel where he used to have regularly, and then returned home by walk, in the dark.
When my stay was about to end, he took me to the "Dena Silks" dress show room, to get a pant-shirt for me. He bought cloth for pant-shirt, in white and white color. As he worked as a switch man in Southern Railways, in white and white uniform, I think he had a liking for white and white dresses. I noticed that he was bargaining like anything with that shop owner, to reduce its price - another skill I don't have, even now. Finally he got it at a price closer to what he had asked for, and at his level, the bargain was a success. The tailor who was sitting in front of "Dena Silks" with his tailoring machine, Natraj tailor, was our neighbour in Muduthurai. He took measurements and we got the dress on the next day in our home. I think I was wearing that dress on my return trip.
Another instance of my interaction with him happened in Satyamangalam, when he was in my Aunt's home (my father's first younger sister), when he was undergoing a treatment for a would in his right palm. He was hospitalized and that was the reason for our trip to Sathyamangalam. After he was discharged, he and Paati were staying in Athai's home. One day he wanted to go to a temple which was on the other side of the Satyamangalam bridge, that was on the river Bavani. I was studying in 7th standard at that time, and I accompanied him. We walked from home, reached the bridge, walked over the bridge, reached the other side, and then walked towards the temple. All through the way he was talking with me, something that he rarely used to do. The temple was locked, and we waited outside for sometime. During that time too, he was talking to me, at length. Once the temple opened, we went inside, prayed go God, and returned home. That was my last interaction with him.
On 28-Aug-1991 night, our regular postman came to our home with a telegram. It carried the message of my Grandfather's demise. Addressed to my father, it said "Your Father Expired. Start Immediately". It was sent by my father's cousin brother - Manohara Chitapa. By that time, we had laid our mats, and were ready to sleep. All of a sudden we packed and started. We went in bus and reached our Grandfather's home early in the morning. I still remember most of what happened on that day, but I don't want to write about them here.
A couple of days later, my Grandmother gave items, that my Grandfather used, to other members of the family. Some got his gold ring and other valuable stuff. She gave his "HMT Kohinoor" watch to me. It was somewhat in a dilapidated condition at that time. Later, I, with the help of my father, took lot of efforts to repair, recover and preserve it. I preserve that in pristine condition from that time onward. Whenever my Aunt (Appa's second younger sister) sees me with that watch on my wrist, she remarks "Enga Annanoda (referring to her Father as Annan) watchu", with a smile that I couldn't deciper whether it indicates happiness or regret. After a long time, today I keyed it and wearing it now, as I am typing this article.
At 66, he left for heavenly abode. But by that time, his son, and two daughters were married and well-settled. That was also the start of the second phase of my Grandmother's life, which in my view, was another reasonably enjoyable phase, with my Grandfather's pension, supporting her daughters and their families.
From the way I look and talk, many used to say that I almost resemble my Grandfather, but for his bald head (By the way, I am a few inches shorter than him). So, he still lives, and he will continue to live, like how I also will continue to live on this earth forever.
- Pavala
28-Aug-2020.
